Remember way back as a kid when you were bored with routine you invariably were also bored with playmates and siblings, quarrels and sulks ruled the day and your Mom usually intervened with something to distract you and bring back the smiles. I certainly remember those days with my own kids and sounding horribly like my own mother with dire warnings that, "there will be tears before bedtime". Well, it turns out that things aren't all that different in adult relationships.
A recent study in western Europe attempting to determine what makes couples stay in love, stay excited with one another after 30 or more years of marriage, concluded that varying activities, trying something new and creating fun, enhanced feelings of love and wanting to be together! Turns out that bringing on the giggles turns on the brains receptors to warm, fuzzy feelings. Doing something even slightly daring gives an adrenaline rush and that starts you talking.
I was thinking of examples in my own life when I've felt especially close to my husband and low and behold, times I remember best are ones that had us stretching our limits, trying something new and invariable laughing until we cried. We were frozen a few years ago on grand kid duty at a ski resort. The adult kids were off on the slopes and we were with the under fives in the sledding area; we were not only freezing but bored. "Come on," my husband shouted grabbing me by the arm, "we're going to give this a try." He rented a two- seater toboggan and down we went. Literally and many times! Grand kids were applauding us, other couples looked on in amazement as two perfectly staid looking folk hurled (slow hurl) down the bunny slopes, shrieking like banshees.
I think getting out of comfort role brings you closer together. You're doing something just for the heck of it and there's no competition involved. I recall an expression used by my Dad, "a change is as good as a cure". It's true and a lesson I consciously try to incorporate into my life. A bit like taking a detour when it really isn't necessary to do so. You know what, if things are a tad boring in your relationship, instead of sighing and picking the lint off his sweater, lean over and whisper something naughty in his ear ..."wanna to go bungee jumping with me?" You never know.
Psst! Wanna Do Something Naughty With Me